Ten ways to pray for new adoptive families

Someone recently contacted Home for Good to ask how they can effectively pray for an adoptive family in their church who were about to start the introductions process and would then be bringing their children home for good.

What a wonderful question to be asked!

We love that so many people and churches are increasingly recognising what a powerful difference support can make to foster and adoptive families, and we believe that prayer support is a key aspect of this.

Thank you to everyone who seeks to support families, both practically and prayerfully.

We thought that there might be others interested in our suggestions in response to the original question, so here are ten ways to pray for new adoptive families during their introductions and early days together.

1. Pray for the children

There is an almost endless list of things you could pray over the children, but specifically, do pray for their hearts and minds as they seek to make sense of all that is going on. Pray that they would understand (especially if they are young), pray for them as they may miss their foster family, and pray against any feelings of abandonment as they process this loss in the midst of all their other emotions.

2. Pray for the parents

The early days, weeks and months are emotional and exhausting. Pray for strength, peace and comfort in the midst of both joys and trials.

3. Pray for special bonding moments

Bonding and attachment will take time (perhaps even many years) but you can pray that it begins in significant and special moments between new parents and children, whether it’s through reading a story, playing a favourite game, pushing on a swing, or perhaps even in a precious first cuddle.

4. Pray for any siblings

If there are other children in the family, include them in your prayers as they seek to welcome their new sibling and make sense of everything. Pray especially against feelings of rivalry or being ‘left out’.

5. Pray for good routines to be established

We have heard from so many families that settling swiftly into a routine can make all the difference, especially for bedtimes. Pray that children would find assurance and stability in the rhythm and consistency of routines.

6. Pray especially at confusing and unsettling times

Social worker visits, starting new schools, meeting extended family – pray specifically for peace and reassurance in all the moments of change.

7. Pray for the wider family, friends and church

It can be tough to manage the hopes and expectations of everyone, so pray that all those connected to the new family would be sensitive and patient in how they seek to welcome and would prioritise the children’s needs above their own.

8. Pray for practicalities and a great network of support

So many wonderful people wrap around new families with meals, ironing, offers of clothes or toys, or even babysitting for siblings. Pray for meal rotas to run smoothly, for people to offer help when it’s needed, and for adoptive families to know who they can go to for extra support.

9. Pray for the primary carer when their partner returns to work

This won’t be the case for everyone, but if it is it can be a particularly challenging time. Pray for both parents as they get used to their new roles, for the children as they adapt to the new normal, and for good support when it’s needed.

10. Pray for God’s protection as He settles the family together

Pray that the whole family would be aware of God’s presence in every moment.

If you would like more ideas for how to support families, take a look at these other articles: Supporting foster and adoptive families: 10 things that really make a difference 20 ways to engage and support children and young people with attachment difficulties What the Church needs to know about the real impact of support